What would you do if you knew you could not fail?

This question was on a wee card I found in a shop while out with the kids when they were very young. My days used to be filled with breakfasts, school, kids’ activities, shopping, dinner time, bath-time, bedtime routines and nights with broken sleep dealing with sickness. In those days there wasn’t much time to think about myself and what I wanted beyond happy, healthy kids, but I did daydream about being “more” myself.

The card was honestly more for the kids—not to limit themselves in what they wanted to do with their lives. I had uprooted myself from my home country at 23 years old, leaving my family behind for a new life in Minnesota, USA. I wasn’t feeling like I hadn’t done anything with my life, but I wasn’t completely happy. My quiet moments of unhappiness came from an unfulfilled marriage, but also a feeling of ambition that wasn’t being satisfied.

Around 2007, the question on the card, coupled with the loss of my best friend, Susie, led me to take action. That’s probably another story in itself, for another time.

After sitting quietly and thinking, “What would I really love to do?” I came up with an answer. Susie and I used to go to aerobics classes. I always fancied myself as an instructor. I don’t have a big personality, so never thought it would be something I could do, but I kept thinking.

I was taking Pilates classes through community education while Susie was sick, and those classes—with the movement and the breath and the focus—helped me stay afloat when I was losing her. I enjoyed those classes. I loved the instructor and her passion for passing on what she knew. It was a place to retreat to in a grief-filled, turbulent time in my life. With the conversations with Susie in my mind about missed opportunities, I decided I’d learn how to teach it myself.

So there I was with an idea. It’s funny how things come together in a particular moment. One of the mums in Murray’s preschool class was connected to Lifetime Fitness. I decided to share my plans with her. She said I should go teach for Lifetime. “Go big or go home,” she said. I liked that. It would stretch me beyond what I thought I could do. I liked feeling uncomfortable. It pushed me forward.

Long story short, I trained to become comprehensively certified through Lifetime and taught there for many years. During COVID, I joined that same fabulous instructor in opening her own studio. Pilates has provided me with a wonderful journey and has given me the health and the body to endure it.

During COVID, with the desire to return to Scotland and be closer to my family, I daydreamed about opening my own studio and passing on what I know to the people of Glasgow. And here I am, back in Scotland, working through planning applications, negotiations with the landlord and financing expensive equipment. It’s a risk. Almost everything worthwhile is.

Could I fail? The answer in that moment was no. It wasn’t an option. There was too much good to come out of it. I haven’t always felt that way, so keeping the thought of “not failing” alive has been an important part of the journey.

So that’s my story to date.

It’s a good practice, just asking yourself the question: if you knew you couldn’t fail, what would you do?